the earth within;

I Had a Dream.

My biological father is actually Robin Williams (most likely because I watched his episode of Louie yesterday). My mom acts sort of like Mary-Louise Parker in Weeds, only quieter. I have an aunt named Mel who apparently took care of me most of my life since my mom couldn’t get over Robin Williams. (I don’t have an Aunt Mel.) Robin had written a note on my old combination lock with a story about how he hit a guy; it ended with “I totally hit him”. 

My mom is absent-mindedly driving with me in the passenger. It is a cloudy, rainy day reflective of our melancholy. First, some cars parked on the side of the road are opening their doors into the street and my mom avoids them. Then, she casually turns in and rear ends one of the parked cars. The police officer(?) inspects the damage, tells us what needs to be fixed for some reason, and notices that there is a note written on the rearview mirror in Japanese about me, Mel, and Robin Williams (his name is in katakana). Mom and I go to a doctor’s office. (Robin is a doctor.) We wait. I’m sitting on a very large futon next to a rolled up rug. The office is pirate themed and a television plays something that is vaguely like Pirates of the Caribbean, but which is also somehow The Dark Knight. The secretary tells everyone to get out now. A lady asks, “Even the children?” Secretary says, “Yes,” and shoos everyone out (mostly old ladies). My mom walks up to the secretary; she gives my mom some tablets real quick apparently trying to appease her medical issues so that she’ll leave; my mom takes them and walks past her—we’re going to see Robin Williams no matter what. Robin Williams is not in an office but rather a clinic-esque area with two hospital beds. Robin is an asian dude who is not as old as the real Robin Williams; he has three Asian kids and apparently an Asian monk for a gay partner. But I guess he’s still Robin Williams because I tell him I saw him on Louie just this morning and he laughs embarrassingly as if he was on the show. We reminisce about the note on the lock and about how he is my father. And then we leave—all in tears.